So, Albus Dumbledore is gay and Christians are idiots. I’m not telling you anything you didn’t already know, I suppose.

It seems that J K Rowling has posthumously outed Dumbledore. In a fan Q and A at New York’s Carnegie Hall, Rowling was asked if Dumbledore had ever enjoyed passion in his life. She answered, “My truthful answer to you is that I have always thought of Dumbledore as gay.” She went on to explain his relationship with Gellert Grinwald, explored in the final book of the Potter septology, as a love affair. To be honest, anyone that read that particular story and didn’t pick up on the homo-erotic subtext should watch a few Carry On films and have a serious word with themselves.

Apparently Rowling was cheered when she revealed this revelation and was quite surprised at the adulation. “If I’d known it would make you so happy I would have announced it years ago,” she said. Well, she did announce it really, in the books. It’s actually very good that she made the sub-text apparent without actually announcing it out loud. It makes the whole subject less relevant and simply more character development. After all, so what if the Headmaster of Hogwarts is gay?

Hands up if you like men!

And then, as surely as night follows day, the idiots begin to swarm. One particular idiot is Georgia mother and anti-Potter campaigner Laura Mallory. She has been campaigning hard to have the Harry Potter books removed from school libraries on the grounds that they “indoctrinate anti-Christian values”. The irony of a devout Christian arguing that indoctrination is a bad thing. To quote the woman, “My prayer is that parents would wake up, that the subtle way this is presented as harmless fantasy would be exposed for what it really is: a subtle indoctrination into anti-Christian values.”

Well, Laura Mallory, let me riposte. I wish that you and others like you would wake up and recognise that the sledgehammer way in which your Bible is presented as fact would be exposed for the harmful fantasy that it really is: a not so subtle indoctrination into anti-intelligence values.

On the subject of Dumbledore’s homosexuality, Mallory said, “A homosexual lifestyle is a harmful one. That’s proven, medically.”

And an idiot will say anything if it fits their agenda. That’s proven time and time again, no medical required.