Michael over at aNadder posted about some very curious keywords that people had used in 2008 that had subsequently led them to his blog. He did do a series of posts about sexual ethics so you might expect some weird searches to lead to him. Still, he suggested that anyone else consider themselves tagged and try the same thing.
That’s the kind of wordplay that entertains me, so I went off to my stats to see what words had led people here. Here are some highlights from the list of keyword searches for 2008, all the bold parts being that actual words or phrases that led people here:
“satan was a lesbian” fred haley
“sleaze paperbacks”
But let’s be honest – I wrote about those things, so that’s to be expected.
allan baxter naked
What?! Given that they spelled my name wrong I can only hope they were after someone else. They would have been disappointed anyway. There’s no naked pics of me at this website.
little girl fullof scum
This one has me rather concerned. My novella “A ‘Verse Full of Scum” is available here for free, but I don’t think that’s what this person was actually looking for.
strong-language cunt
Fair enough.
yass marijuana
Yass is a town not far from me. But seriously, as if those people would have a website.
panama hats quiz
This one is just a bit surreal. Is there such a thing? A quiz for panama hats? About them?
grammdaemonium
This is just a cool word. I didn’t know what it meant and neither did anyone else it seemed. Then it turned out to be the name of a blog I’d randomly commented on ages ago.
+turd +busters +sewage
Someone with a plumbing problem at home? I also had this one:
tuurrrdd busters
I have no comment to make about that.
always in the shit only the depth varies
True, true…
is star wars a true story
Errr…
satan worshipping cult
Maybe. Maybe not. Who’s asking?
tiga scrotum
OK, now it’s getting weird.
what colour is a purple finch?
Well, I’m just guessing but… Actually, this isn’t as obvious as it seems. It’s in a post about such things and includes questions like “How long was the Hundred Years War?” The answers aren’t as obvious as you might think.
“effing” “harry potter”
I know how they feel.
“scrotum man” pic
A new kind of superhero?
“you’d eat beaver if you could get it”
I’m not entirely sure I would. Unless you mean…
alan baxter nude
alan baxter nude photos
Right, well now they’re spelling it right too. This guy must be a real hunk. Maybe it is me they’re after.
can’t be fagged
Nah, me neither.
lesbian names
They have special names?
oprah and the word nigger
Never shall be in the same sentence beyond web searches.
wet naked women
Can’t blame the person for searching for this one, but they would have been disappointed when they landed here.
Fortunately my blog doesn’t seem to attract anything like the dregs of humanity that Michael’s blog does. Pat yourself on the back, dear Reader, you’re among a higher class of society.
.
I can explain the Allan Baxter naked one – it’s someone looking for news about the Scottish skiier Alain Baxter – look here : http://skiing.about.com/b/2008/08/21/naked-skier-has-hopes-for-2010-olympics.htm
PS it wasn’t me by the way! I was the ‘wet naked women’!
Somehow I think most of those searchers were disappointed with what my posts are actually about and left quite quickly.
By the way — by posting these keywords as direct text on your blog (instead of screenshots) you’re about to start getting a whole lot more traffic for stuff like yass marijuana
Ah yes, good point. I can’t be fagged to do anything about that though.
Ha! Great post… I’d consider it but if it generated spam then it would just annoy the crap out of me
Some of those keywords are killer. “Is star wars a true story” is the best LOL
I know. Someone actually asked that!