Monthly Archives: August 2010

BOFF and a free book

By
9
August 18, 2010

If you’re a regular around here you’ll know that I periodically post a bit of free fiction under the Friday Flash banner. Friday Flash is the brainchild of J M Strother. His idea was that every friday people post a piece of flash fiction (1,000 words or less) on their websites and share said fiction with others via the #fridayflash hashtag on Twitter. It grew very popular and now J M has an engine on his site that collates all the stories every week and it’s become quite the fiction movement. So much so that there’s now a Best Of volume – BOFF, or Best Of Friday Flash Vol. 1, is available now as an ebook with a trade paperback coming soon.

I certainly don’t post every week, but one of my stories was lucky enough to be selected for inclusion in this first Best Of. As a promotion for the launch of the book, you can win a free copy along with a free copy of another novel, just by commenting on J M’s blog. The other novel might be Strange New Feet, by Shannon Esposito, Prophecy Moon by Laura Eno or RealmShift, by little old me. Two free books, just for making a comment. You can’t say fairer than that.

Get over to J M’s site now to enter and learn more about the BOFF while you’re there.

The full Table of Contents for the collection can be found here.

BOFF Cover BOFF and a free book

Nothing to see here

By
3
August 17, 2010

No really, this is a test post. I apologise for any inconvenience.

As compensation, here’s what happens if you cross Giger’s Alien with My Little Pony:

my little alien Nothing to see here

Move along now. Nothing to see here.

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Become a Shambler to win a zombie prize pack

By
0
August 16, 2010

UncleSamZombie Become a Shambler to win a zombie prize packNecroscope is the zombie-specific sub-blog of Horrorscope, the Australian Dark Fiction blog, described thusly:

NecroScope is the official zombie review subsite of Horrorscope (the award-winning news and literary criticism zine dedicated to dark fiction). Necroscope deals specifically with all things related to zombies, revenants, and the walking dead, whether in fiction, non-fiction, cinema, comics, games, or any other media, and regardless of origin or variety (supernatural or viral, Voodoo or Romero).

At the moment, Necroscope is having a subscription drive. Become a Shambler (a Necroscope follower) and go into the draw to win a prize-pack of zombie-related goodies:

* A copy of the novel State of Decay, by James Knapp (Roc, 2010).
* A copy of Feed, by Mira Grant (Orbit, 2010).
* A copy of Dead or Alive, by William Harms (Absolute Tyrant, 2010).
* One copy each of Black House Comics’ After the World: Killable Hours (Clay Blakehills) and After the World: Gravesend (Jason Fischer).
* A copy of Adventures of Huckleberry Finn and Zombie Jim, by Mark Twain and W. Bill Czolgosz (Coscom Entertainment, 2009).
* A copy of The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Zombies, by Nathan Robert Brown (Penguin Books, 2010).
* A copy of the comic George A. Romero’s Night of the Living Dead: The Beginning, Issue #1 (Avatar Press, 2006).

Now that is quite the prize pack you lovers of the shambling dead. Get over to the official site to follow and earn a place in the draw.

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My digital kingdom

By
August 15, 2010

This is as much for my own benefit as anything else, but I thought you lot might be interested. I’ve started fine-tuning my online presence to get a bit more control over it all. I’m the first to admit that I’m an absolute net-whore. I wander around the digital domain waving my business at anyone that happens to look in my direction. Such is the nature of the modern world.

I have all kinds of online communities that I like to be a part of, as well as keeping an online presence to promote my work in the hope that people will be interested enough to read my stuff and help keep my career alive. Or, at least, not entirely moribund. Plus, I just love being a part of the online landscape. I get to meet so many interesting people, learn cool stuff and enjoying absolute lunacy from the around the world, all in the comfort of my office chair. It’s a crazy place out there and I don’t like to miss anything.

So, because of that, I have numerous things to keep an eye on and numerous places to share my own little slices of madcappery. This website, The Word (assuming you’re reading this there), is my main place. It’s the hub of my online activities. But I also have a LiveJournal blog (where you may well be reading this right now) and I’m very active on Twitter and Facebook. (I actually have two Facebook places. The one linked to here is my author page, but the one shared with Posterous and The Word is my personal page, which I keep for people I actually know.)

I’ve also recently become very busy on Posterous, but that’s partly to help streamline all this stuff and partly to collate all the crazies I enjoy. In an attempt to get my head around how I’ve set everything up, and in an effort to show anyone else that may be interested, I came up with this little diagram. It illustrates all the places that I’m active and how those places cross-pollinate each other to save me posting things in multiple places.

my digital kingdom My digital kingdom

I hope that helps to clarify things, if you were even vaguely interested in knowing. Everywhere you see an arrow is an automatic share, so posting in the one place automatically shares that thing with every place pointed at. And this doesn’t include all the various forums that I tend to chat away on to a greater or lesser extent, depending on mood and time. In fact, looking at this makes me wonder where the fuck I get time to do anything else, but I do. I’m actually pretty good at it. And, with that, I’m off to work on the new novel, before the Grudge Monkey comes looking to kick my arse again.

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Write a haiku, win a zombie novella

By
5
August 13, 2010

I’m prepared to bet that the above title has never been seen by humans before. And it takes a dude like Jason Fischer to make that happen. Jason is a good friend of mine, a top notch writer, a Writers Of The Future winner, no less, and a master of puns. His novella, Gravesend, published by Black House Comics, is available now. It’s an installment in After the World – a new ongoing series, each issue a new story set in a world where the dead don’t take no for an answer.

Gravesend is in newsagents now, but you can win a copy simply by penning a haiku. Jason is running this contest on his site and the rules are very simple:

To enter, simply compose a haiku – the only catch is it must be zombie or apocalypse themed. Post your haiku in this comments thread (either at jasonfischer.com.au or on the LJ feed, it’s all good). As long as you meet the 5-7-5 rule, I’m not too fussed if you mention a seasonal reference – though if you mention winter and brains, it will earn you bonus points.

Go to Jason’s site here to enter. (This contest is only open to Aussie residents). I’ve entered. Will you?

Gravesend Banner 2 Write a haiku, win a zombie novella

Grudge Monkey to enforce motivation

By
8
August 12, 2010

This is the Grudge Monkey:

demotivational posters grudge monkey Grudge Monkey to enforce motivation

That’s right. Get the fuck out of his way.

I’ve come to an arrangement with the Grudge Monkey – he’s going to take it personally whenever I procrastinate or procrastilax. Therefore, if I’m cocking about when I should be writing, Grudge Monkey is going to come and fuck me up. It’s a fairly serious situation I’ve put myself in, but I’m a terrible procrastinator. All writers are in my experience. So drastic action was required.

From now on, whenever I’m not writing when I should be, wasting my time doing something stupid, Grudge Monkey will get pissed off. Shit! Here he comes!

grudge monkey thumb Grudge Monkey to enforce motivation

Dude, get off me! I’m writing. I’M WRITING!

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RealmShift special on Kindle

By
2
August 12, 2010

If you’re a Kindle owner and haven’t read RealmShift yet, my publisher (Gryphonwood Press) is running a special offer at the moment where the book is available for just US0.99c from the Amazon Kindle Store. Its usual Kindle price is US$2.99 so it’s a pretty good offer. I think the special is only going to run for a month, so get in while you can.

If you’re outside the US, there’s a surcharge from Amazon. For example, in Australia it’s a $2 charge, so the price is down to $2.99 from $4.99. If you’re in the UK, you can now also find both RealmShift and MageSign at the UK Kindle Store. It’s Kindle-o-Rama!

If you’d be so kind as to spread the word to any of your fellow Kindle (or iPhone, iPad, etc.) owners, I’d be very grateful. And that’s enough self-pimpage for now!

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The writing life update

By
4
August 11, 2010

Things are interesting in my writing at the moment. I’m deep into the first draft of my third novel. I’m at that stage where I’m both loving and hating it. I love the fact that I’m writing a novel again, as I do adore getting my teeth into a great big story with no real word count restrictions. I’m hating it because I want it to be really good and have regular waves of writerly anxiety. Is this story really any good? Are my characters cliches? Am I just a hack that should give it all up and become a tax accountant? You know, the usual stuff. But I’m close to 60,000 words into the thing, so I’ll finish it up now out of self-spite if nothing else. The truth is, I’m actually quite pleased with the thing so far – I reckon it’s pretty cool. So fuck it, plough on and see what happens. I did want to have a first draft finished before Worldcon, but I think that’s being a bit optimistic. We’ll see.

On the short fiction front, I’ve been working on a few bits and pieces this year. I’ve got a couple of things on the boil that might become interesting, but I won’t say anything yet. No point in jinxing myself by kicking Fate in the balls with a premature announcement of any kind.

I’ve also just submitted a short story to Ticonderoga’s Dead Red Heart anthology. I was utterly seduced by this one – an anthology of distinctly Australian vampire yarns. How can you resist? It was one of those submission calls where I instantly had an idea and couldn’t wait to write the thing. I’ve spent several weeks on it (with some critical help from good writing friends) and have just submitted it, so wish me luck. The submission window is open internationally until December, so have a go if you’re so inclined. Although, I’d rather you didn’t. I don’t want the competition.

Now I plan to concentrate on the novel and nothing else until the first draft is done. But there are the Speakeasy and After The Rain anthologies, both of which are very tempting…

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Movie Review – Kick-Ass (Real Life Super Heroes)

By
6
August 10, 2010

shut up kick ass poster Movie Review   Kick Ass (Real Life Super Heroes)Regulars here at The Word will probably remember this post from back in December 2008. The post was a quick one, just for a laugh. The real value is found in the comments. But brace yourself for a big read if you haven’t been there before. There’s 156 comments and we get our very own RLSH or Real Life Super Heroes commenting and having a pissing contest. It’s hilarious reading, so I urge you to check it out. But what does that have to do with a movie review of Kick-Ass? I’m glad you asked. Kick-Ass is a movie about real life superheroes, that a lot of Real Life SuperHeroes got upset about. Seriously, read the comments to the post I just mentioned. But really, any “real life” vigilante justice wielder getting upset about Kick-Ass is a bit like a real archeologist getting upset about the Indiana Jones movies, but I digress. The REAL real life superheroes don’t get into whining matches on the internet, so it’s all a bit moot.

I finally got around to seeing Kick-Ass just recently, and I’m really glad I did. The film is based on the comic book of the same name by Mark Millar and John Romita, Jr. It’s basically the story of Dave Lizewski. He’s your typical high school nobody and comic book fan who wonders, as we all do at some point, why some real people haven’t actually tried out the superhero thing. After all, Batman has no special powers, so all you really need to be a superhero is a fancy costume and a sense of justice, plus the balls to get out there and do something about it.

kick ass hit girl Movie Review   Kick Ass (Real Life Super Heroes)So that’s what Dave does, styling himself as the superhero Kick-Ass. Of course, everything goes about as wrong as it possibly can. Fortunately, he ends up bumping into Big Daddy and Hit Girl. This father and daughter double act really are real life superheroes and they help Dave out of some sticky situations. They get entangled with the mob and Red Mist, a new kind of superhero, that’s actually the head mobster’s son using Kick-Ass’s sensibilities against him. From here things get brilliantly hectic and out of control.

The film is excellent fun. It’s true comic book mayhem with a heavy dose of realism that makes for highly entertaining viewing. The filming itself is very slick and the soundtrack is awesome. It’s sharp, funny, poignant and hella violent. All that good stuff we love.

There was a lot of controversy around the time of its release related to the Hit-Girl character. Mainly because she’s a little girl (something like 11 years old) that says fuck and cunt and shoots bad guys in the head. But what’s wrong with that? She a little girl that’s been trained by her father to be a seriously bad-ass assassin superhero, ever since her father got out of prison. Her mother died at the hands of the mob and daddy is on a revenge trip, taking his little girl along for the ride. He shoots her while she’s wearing a bullet proof vest so she isn’t surprised when it happens for real, for fuck’s sake. And people are getting upset about the fact that she swears? Within the context of the movie, Hit-Girl is just about the best and most realised character there. She’s also brilliantly played by Chloë Grace Moretz. This girl is just awesome in the role.

KickAssHitGirl Movie Review   Kick Ass (Real Life Super Heroes)When an uncensored preview clip of the film was shown before release, it was attacked by “family advocacy groups” for its violence and Hit-Girl’s line, “Okay you cunts, let’s see what you can do now!” delivered by Chloë Moretz, who was 11 at the time of filming. Australian Family Association spokesman John Morrissey claimed that “the language [was] offensive and the values inappropriate – without the saving grace of the bloodless victory of traditional superheroes”. Bloodless victory!? Has this fuckwit ever actually read a comic book? In response, Moretz said in an interview, “If I ever uttered one word that I said in Kick-Ass, I would be grounded for years! I’d be stuck in my room until I was 20! I would never in a million years say that. I’m an average, everyday girl.” What do you know – an eleven year old girl can seperate reality from the moving pictures. John Morrissey should grow the fuck up. Moretz couldn’t even say the name of the film outside of character, calling it “the film” in public and “Kick-Butt” at home. Brilliant acting skills and serious smarts. This kid will go far. (Incidentally, I wonder if there would have been so much controversy if the character had been a boy rather than a girl?)

The film juggles the levels of realism and comic book mayhem really well, leading to some truly shocking moments. Dave’s first outing as Kick-Ass springs to mind for its relentless realism, for example. If anything, this movie does more to educate people about real life from a “superhero” perspective than the actual comic books have ever done.

If you’re a fan of cinema and especially if you’re a fan of comic books and that style of cinema, you’ll love this film. If you’re a namby pamby wowser that gets upset when little girls shoot a mobster through the head at point blank range, it’s probably not the film for you. And did I mention that it’s very funny?

I was also pleased to see recently that Kick-Ass 2: Balls to the Wall is in production for a 2012 release. More please!

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Nowhere in the Bible does Jesus have a sword fight

By
2
August 6, 2010

I’m a big fan of the site 27b/6. The guy is very funny and sets up all kinds of awesome correspondence where his irreverance holds sway. I’m sure he’s actually a really annoying guy, as one of the commenters (fiona) on his site says:

“i have a feeling that i would want to stab you in real life but on the internet i want to marry you.”

He earns a place on my site here because everything he does is an example of great writing. His turn of phrase is often exquisite. He’s excelled himself with this one and I couldn’t help sharing. The exchange in question begins with this email to his kid’s school’s Christian Volunteer:

From: David Thorne
Date: Wednesday 10 March 2010 7.12pm
To: Darryl Robinson
Subject: Permission Slip

Dear Darryl,

I have received your permission slip featuring what I can only assume is a levitating rabbit about to drop an egg on Jesus.

Thank you for pre-ticking the permission box as this has saved me not only from having to make a choice, but also from having to make my own forty five degree downward stroke followed by a twenty percent longer forty five degree upward stroke. Without your guidance, I may have drawn a picture of a cactus wearing a hat by mistake.

As I trust my offspring’s ability to separate fact from fantasy, I am happy for him to participate in your indoctrination process on the proviso that all references to ‘Jesus’ are replaced with the term ‘Purportedly Magic Jew.’

Regards, David.

You can just tell it’s going to be fun, can’t you.

Read the whole thing here.

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Welcome

The website of author Alan Baxter

Alan Baxter, Author

Author of horror, dark fantasy & sci-fi. Kung Fu instructor. Motorcyclist. Dog lover. Gamer. Heavy metal fan. Britstralian. Misanthrope. Learn more about me and my work by clicking About Alan just below the header.

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